Is there anything quite as aggravating as being ignored by the man you love?

Why Your Ex Boyfriend is Ignoring You

Men and women react very differently in the wake of a break up. That’s true whether they’re ready to move on or whether they’re both still in love. Men process emotional events in a very different way. They tend to need space to think about what’s happened and to get in touch with what they’re feeling. I call it the “cool down period.” This varies for every man but it generally lasts anywhere from a week to a month. During this time the man in question (your ex boyfriend) just needs uninterrupted time to really comes to terms with the break up and with what he wants in his future. While that’s happening you should expect him to ignore you. He needs to for his own emotional sake.

How to Use His Behavior to Your Advantage

I’m the first to admit that I haven’t always handled emotional situations with my man the way I should. Most women will admit to the same. In fact, many women will actually push their ex boyfriend to talk when he’s clearly not in the mood for it. This usually translates into numerous unanswered calls, countless text messages that get no response and even in person run-ins in which the ex boyfriend turns the other direction just to avoid contact.

As much as this hurts, you have to see it for what it is. Your ex boyfriend clearly is expressing that he doesn’t want contact. Each time you reach out to talk to him you’re not only going against what he wants and needs at the moment but you’re also devaluing yourself as a woman. In essence, you’re chasing after a man who has made it abundantly obvious that he wants nothing to do with you.

That’s why you have to mimic his behavior and drop out of sight yourself. A man feels some sense of security in knowing that a woman is still madly in love with him. Your ex boyfriend may be annoyed on the surface by your persistent attempts to talk with him, but underneath he’s likely taking pleasure in the knowledge that you’re not giving up.

Take a Step Back From Your Ex Boyfriend Right Now!

If you show your ex boyfriend that you’re done chasing him, that will impact him. Telling him isn’t going to result in anything more than him thinking you’re trying to win him back by creating pity. However, if you just stop chasing him suddenly, he’ll start to wonder why. It doesn’t matter if he’s been ignoring you for a week or a month, if you drop out of sight, he’ll suddenly want to talk to you.

This isn’t easy for most women but I want you to imagine the end result. Consider the fact that if you take a few days or weeks to rethink your own feelings post break up and during that time you stop all contact, you’re going to be in a much better position to get him back.

Many women make the mistake of thinking that if they drop off their ex boyfriend’s radar that he’ll believe they’re no longer interested. That’s how a woman’s mind thinks, not a man’s. He’s going to instead imagine you with another man. Your ex boyfriend is going to instantly jump to the conclusion that you’re done with him for good. Once that happens, the man who seemed to constantly ignore you will suddenly answer all those text messages and will be returning those voicemails.

At this point, the power in getting back shifts from his hands into yours. So find your patience and inner strength and walk away from your ex boyfriend who is ignoring you, for now. It’s likely to be one of the best decisions you’ll ever make.

There is a shocking and easy way to get your ex boyfriend back. It’s guaranteed to work. Learn how you can make your ex boyfriend crave to be with you again.

When a man expresses to the woman he’s involved with that he’s lost feelings for her, he’s gauging her reaction. Relationships change over time and many men simply become bored. If your boyfriend feels that the sizzle has long since left your connection, he may see you now as more of a friend than a lover. The fact that he told you what he was feeling, or what he isn’t feeling anymore, instead of just dumping you shows that he’s willing to try to repair whatever damage has occurred. That’s why it’s incredibly important that you don’t overreact to his confession and instead see it as a step towards rebuilding what has been lost.

By the time a man tells his girlfriend that he’s losing interest, he’s already got one foot out the door towards another relationship. In general, men can detach from their girlfriend much easier than she can detach from him. Typically this means that you’re going to have to put in more effort to save the relationship because he’s not as invested in it as he once was. You shouldn’t view this as anything more than a hurdle. You can get past it and reawaken his attention.

Don’t Constantly Talk About What’s Wrong With the Relationship

Your boyfriend is expecting you to panic and go all out in an effort to save the relationship. He’s expecting endless phone calls, gifts, and love notes. In fact, men will tell you that they often use their girlfriend’s reaction to the looming end of the relationship to gauge her commitment. This is a cruel way of judging your feelings and it’s unacceptable. You are not going to fall into this trap. You must make a promise to yourself, right now, that you won’t bring up what he said. If he told you that he’s fallen out of love, or he’s lost feelings for you or he’s not sure of his future, just sigh, smile shyly and tell him that you feel the same way. That one statement on your part, will jerk him right back into reality and the prospect of losing you.

Don’t Try and Make Him Jealous in an Effort to Get Him to Feel Something

As much as it drives us crazy to even consider that our boyfriend is talking to another woman, men just don’t care much either way. If your man has said that he’s not feeling as close to you as he once did, and you suddenly start hanging out with a very attractive man who you refer to as just as “friend,” your boyfriend is going to assume you’ve moved on and he’ll follow suit. Jealousy really has no place in any healthy relationship so don’t try to drag it into yours as a tool to recapture your boyfriend’s love. It won’t work.

Do Get On With Your Own Life

Putting your life on hold while you try and manage your relationship is giving it more value than it needs, at the moment. Your feelings haven’t changed and spending all your time consumed with thoughts about how to change your boyfriend’s feelings is useless and exhausting. He fell in love with you at a time when you were likely self focused, independent and happy. You have to try your best to allow him this time to figure out what he feels while you continue moving forward with your life. Your boyfriend doesn’t want to spend his time with a drama queen so don’t allow yourself the opportunity to fall into that role. Be satisfied with what you have, at this moment.

Do Encourage Your Boyfriend to Take Some Time to Think

Your boyfriend is likely waiting for you to beg him to stay and to give you another chance to show him why he should love you. If you instead, encourage him to take some time to consider what he wants in his life, you’ll be essentially hitting him with a left hook he didn’t see coming. Suggest that he hang out with his friends more, explore his hobbies and pursue his career goals. Make it clear that you’re going to do exactly the same. Men expect us to act a certain way in stressful, emotional situations. If we, instead, act compassionate, strong and in control, it pushes them to address their feelings in a very real way. Nothing makes a man want you more than acting as though you only want to be “his friend.”

I, too, have been in your shoes, on the brink of losing a man I truly and utterly adored. You can learn more about my personal journey towards reconciling with my boyfriend here.

The First Step to Make Him Regret the Break Up

The first, and definitely most important, step to take when you want to ensure your ex regrets the moment of the break up is to become the woman you’ve always longed to be. We all wish there were things about ourselves we could change. They don’t necessarily have to be related to our physical beings. For instance, if you’ve long wished you could pursue a degree, enrol in night classes. If you’ve toyed with the idea of changing careers, do some research into that now. Whatever you’ve had on your personal self improvement to-do list should be your sole focus. This is the moment in your life when you can become the woman you’ve always known you had the potential to be.

Don’t Use Jealousy to Make Him Wish He Had You Back

Many women mistakenly jump to the incorrect conclusion that in order to make their ex feel deep regret he has to imagine them with another man. It makes sense in a very logical world, but love and emotion are far from logical. If you travel down this heady road and you attempt to make your ex jealous, you’re going to end up feeling more alone than you do now. Men aren’t like us. They don’t feel the fire of envy boiling within them when they see an ex with another lover. For us, as women, this is often the catalyst that makes us rush back to our ex, hearts all confused, ready to do whatever he wants to make the relationship work. Men would much rather just walk away for good. If your ex boyfriend sees, hears or even imagines that you’re dating another man, he’ll push you out of his heart forever. The only regret he will feel is regret for not ending the relationship sooner. Hell believe, based on your actions, that you had one foot out the door for months and were just waiting to grab your chance to be with someone else.

Maturity as a Tool to Make Him Remember His Love for You

I know how difficult it is to stay poised when you are faced with something as tumultuous as a painful breakup. You feel as though your heart is on your sleeve and you struggle to understand what you should be doing tomorrow, let alone for the rest of your life. Those emotions are personal and should be kept as such. If you call your ex asking him repeatedly why he dumped you or what you can do to win him back, you’re devaluing who you are as a potential, future partner to him. You have to resist all temptation to do that. You must stay strong and focused on the end goal which is that future that you dream of.

If you distance yourself from your ex boyfriend for a time and show him that you’re strong with or without him, he’ll soon start to regret the break up. He’ll see all the qualities in you that he initially fell for. He’ll remember the woman who could make him laugh at the drop of a hat and who could touch his heart unlike anyone else. By being strong, self focused and removed, you will be drawing him back in and the only bait you have to use is maturity and patience.

Learn about my personal journey to get my ex boyfriend back. It’s never as bleak as it seems – you can get him to love you again if you understand the steps you need to take and what you must avoid doing.

Whenever a woman says, “I want him back,” it’s almost inevitably followed by the words, “and I’ll do anything to make it happen.” That’s a big no-no in the world of emotional logic. If you make it known to your ex that you’re willing to jump as high as he wants or beg as often as he desires, in a bid to get him back, you’re diminishing your own self worth. He’s going to see you as someone who values herself based on someone else, in this case him. In other words, if you show him that you’ll jump through hoops to get him back, you’re essentially telling him that he’s more important than you are in your own eyes. That’s not something you ever want to have happen with any man, especially one that you want to get back into your life.

Shift Your Attitude to Make Him Want You Back

If you want him back you’re going to have to shift your attitude from that of a desperate love sick girl to a confident, self assured woman. Men aren’t interested in women who chase them endlessly, particularly women who they used to date. He’s already seen all your flaws so if you show him that you are also pathetic in the aftermath of a break up, he’s going to run in the opposite direction as fast as his feet will carry him. You have to pull yourself together and at least give the illusion that you are okay without him. It’s this one thing that will make a huge impact on your ex.

I know it can be hard to tear yourself away from thinking about him constantly, but there are specific things you can do that will make it easier. I always advise women to finish something they’ve been putting off after the break up. It may be a course that you’ve always wanted to take in the evenings or perhaps it’s a room that needs painting in your apartment. Maybe you’ve been longing to spend time with a friend you haven’t seen in years. Choose something that has been on your to-do list for some time and get it done. Then move on to the next thing. If you can shift your focus to things that you are eager to do, you’ll find that you think about your ex less and less.

Use No Contact or Limited Contact to Get His Interest Back

Many people advocate no contact after a break up and I recognize the value in this. Essentially, by not talking with your ex at all you’re not only giving him the chance to see how strong you are without him but you’re also giving yourself time to not only breathe, but to grieve as well. You have to let go of the lost relationship because no matter what, you two aren’t going to be able to recapture that exactly as it was.

If you don’t feel you can completely do no-contact, then do limited contact. That means that you don’t actively seek out chances to contact your ex but you do respond if he contacts you. Your only responses should be cordial, but not overly friendly. Keep your composure, always end the conversation first and then let him be the one to contact you again. If you can do this, you’ll be showing him that no matter what, you’re not going to chase after him again.

Time can be your best ally when it comes to getting a man to want you back. He’s not going to be able to process the emotions that come with a break up as quickly as you do. Men just aren’t wired that way. He needs time to see what he’s lost and you need to give him that time.

I understand how hard it can be to love a man you’re no longer with. Please read about my personal break up story and how I went from being distraught over the loss of the man I adored to getting him back.

Your boyfriend was crazy about you at one time. I know that you think fondly, and often, about those times and you wish that you could wave a magical wand over his head that would make him forget the break up and want to be with you again. Although you don’t have any magical powers you do have the advantage of insight. Men are notorious for holding grudges, particularly when it comes to romance. Most women don’t understand that one wrong move or word on their part can kill a man’s desire. That’s why the first move that you absolutely must make now if you want to get your guy to fall back in love with you is to apologize. Yes, I know that’s a hard pill to swallow if you were the one who was dumped. But all isn’t fair in love and war and you need to be the bigger person in this and tell him you’re sorry for how things ended.

You must also show him that life without him can be just as satisfying and fulfilling to you as life with him has been. As a woman, after a break up you wish that he would fall to his knees and proclaim his undying devotion to you, right? Doesn’t it give you goose bumps if you imagine what it would feel like if he called you while crying to beg you to come back to him? We love the thought of that because it oozes romance to us. It’s all about not being able to life without one another. However, your boyfriend is a man and what appeals to him is much different than what appeals to you.

How to Get Your Ex Boyfriend to Chase After You Again

A woman who is reserved, balanced and seems to not care is the type of woman that men chase after. If you act as though you don’t need your ex boyfriend, he’s not going to be able to get enough of you. Right now, he knows that you’d do just about anything to get him to want you again. If you suddenly stop chasing him and if you go from eager to not interested, he’ll want to know why. His mind will conjure up many different scenarios including the idea that you’ve met someone else. The moment your ex thinks that could be even a remote possibility, he’ll want you again.

Here’s what you should be doing starting today if you want to get him to love you again: Ignore him, ignore him and ignore him. Drop out of sight for a few weeks. Have fun and forget about him to the best of your ability. Your absence is going to be deafening to him. He’ll want you more because he’ll assume he can’t have you anymore.

The time after the break up is really the defining moments for the relationship. It can either fall apart forever at this point, or with your intervention, it can be repaired and can flourish. You are in control of your destiny and by being a confident woman who is self sufficient, you’ll stand a much better chance of getting the man you love to want you again.

You’re not alone in your break up. You can read about my personal struggle when my boyfriend dumped me. I hope you learn from my insight and can use some of the tips I share to get your man back and deeper in love with you than he ever was before.

You’re a woman. You feel things deeply, don’t you? You love ferociously and when you’re hurt you can feel it in every corner of your heart

Before you have any type of meaningful discussion with your ex boyfriend you have to consider where the motivation is coming from. Right after a break up, you can’t count on your emotions to steer you in the right direction. You feel overwhelmed with not only sadness over the loss of the relationship, but also anxiety over what the future holds for you. I know that it can even feel terrifying to try and form a thought about a future without him. You’ve been planning your life around him and now he’s gone. How can you possibly move forward towards the unknown without him by your side? If those are the feelings that are driving you to a direct and honest conversation with your ex, stop for a moment. It’s not time.

If your emotions are directing your actions, you have to get yourself to a more lucid place. When you do have a heart to heart with your ex boyfriend it has to happen when you feel somewhat emotionally detached from the situation. By that, I mean that you can’t be on the brink of tears and ready to fall apart at the mere mention of anything he feels you did that played a part in the two of you breaking up. An honest discussion about the end of a relationship is bound to include comments about the behavior of both of you and you must feel strong enough to handle his criticisms.

Take a Break Before You Talk to Your Ex Boyfriend

Taking some time away from the emotions surrounding the relationship and the ending of it is vital. It’s hard to separate yourself from what your heart is feeling but with a concerted effort, it can be done, to a degree. You need to help your heart and mind find a new focus. I’m not suggesting you start a new relationship as a way to fill in your time and energy until you can mend the last one. No, that’s not advisable at all. What you should be doing is looking within and charting a course for your life, at the moment, that doesn’t include your ex boyfriend.

You may want to pursue a new career path by enrolling in the local community college and take a few upgrading courses. Perhaps you’ve always imagined doing a family tree as a gift to your relatives, but you’ve never had the time to devote to it. Or maybe you’re the adventurous type and now is your chance to finally do the rock climbing trip you’ve long wished you could. The point is that this is your time to be selfish and to pursue what you want.

Once you feel emotionally balanced and ready for anything your ex boyfriend may throw at you, call him and gauge where he’s at. He may still be wallowing in self pity after the split and may not be ready to go over what happened and whether he even wants to try again. Listen to his tone, read between the lines of what he says and if it’s not clear that he’s eager to see you, leave it for now.

You never want to rush into having a talk with your ex about the break up. You have one chance to make it meaningful and productive so be patient. You’ll know what it’s the ideal time.

I, too, went through a very painful break up and understand the urgency that you feel in wanting to repair the broken relationship. I share more about my own experiences and how I used text messages as a masterful tool to get him to open up and want me back here.

I know that your first inclination when you feel panicked about the break up is to reach out to him. Maybe you’ve been immersed in thoughts about how great it was when you two used to frequent a certain restaurant or perhaps you’ve been reminded of your ex by the smell of cologne on another man on the subway. Regardless, there are bound to be moments when the need to talk to him feels almost overwhelming. I want you to do one thing when that feeling strikes you. I want you to walk away from your computer and your phone. Reaching out to him when you feel that lost is going to result in you saying things that will come back to haunt you. It’s hard to imagine anything more humiliating than pouring your heart out to an ex boyfriend who then ignores it altogether. If you call him, leave him a voicemail message in which you’re clearly emotionally wrought and he doesn’t respond, you’ll feel worse, yes? That’s why you need to avoid contacting him in those moments.

Why You Need to Ignore Your Ex Boyfriend Too

If he’s blatantly and purposefully ignoring you, there’s little you can do to change it other than mirroring his behavior. I realize this approach may appear as nothing more than a childish game but it’s actually a very effective way for any woman to cope with an ex boyfriend who is ignoring her. If you continue to put yourself out there in the way of trying to connect with your ex and he just pretends like you don’t exist, you’ll become increasingly emotionally fragile. You can’t do that to yourself.

The best way to make him want you back when he’s ignoring you is to pick up the pieces of your life the best you can and move on. There is a certain satisfaction that comes from having your ex chasing after you. You’d certainly feel that way if he was always trying to get you to pay attention to him again, yes? If you stop chasing him now any fulfillment he may have gotten from that will disappear. I can tell you that even though he may not be responding to your attempts to reach out to him, he’s definitely listening to all those voicemail messages you’ve left and he’s read every email and text message numerous times over.

By separating yourself from those emotions for a time you’ll be empowering yourself. It’s going to be difficult the first few days not to contact your ex boyfriend, but each day will become slightly easier. My advice is to follow this routine for at least the next three weeks. Don’t give in to the temptation to send him anything that suggests that you miss him. No late night calls and no random text messages when you’re feeling extra lonely.

How Taking a Break Will Help You Get Him Back

By the end of your self-imposed break from chasing your ex boyfriend you’re going to feel much different. You won’t feel as weighed down by the silence coming from him and you’ll be able to think clearly about what is really best for you in terms of the future.

At this point it’s okay to send him one message asking how he is. Since he hasn’t heard from you in so long, he’ll likely respond. Curiosity will have gotten the better of him by this point and he’ll want to know what you’ve been up to. Be calm, be confident and don’t let him know that all you still want is him back in your life.

By playing it cool, and pacing your interactions with him, you’ll be able to draw him back in. Just remember this: the least attractive thing to a man is a desperate woman. That’s why it’s essential that you take the high road when he is ignoring you. Don’t try and interact with any man who doesn’t want to interact with you. Give it time and distance and you’ll change the dynamic of your relationship with your ex boyfriend.

I, too, have been through a horrible relationship break up and my ex boyfriend ignored me. It was emotionally devastating. I share more of my personal story of getting him back here.

Before you do anything I want you to take a moment to think back to how things were right before the break up. Time has a way of softening the emotions that we experience when we’re first dumped or when we break off the relationship. Back then you likely felt very angry and upset. If your boyfriend told you he didn’t love you anymore you may have even thought about revenge. You were driven by very difficult emotions. Now, since a bit of time has passed since you two were together, you probably are thinking about the good times and all the wonderful moments you two shared. That’s a natural progression of feelings and it’s important to recognize it as such. Just because you’re intent on getting him back, the problems you were experiencing before you split won’t magically disappear.

That’s why it’s often a good idea to think about how you can apologize for whatever you might have done that played a role in things going sour between you and the man you adore. I know, from personal experience, that it’s easy to point the finger of blame at him if he dumped you, but he wouldn’t have done so if things were going well. Perhaps, like me, you let your insecurities shine through and he grew tired of your jealousy nature. Maybe it had more to do with the pressure you were putting on him to take the relationship to the next level. Consider now what you might have done differently because that’s something you’ll have to be mindful of if, and when, you two do find your way back together.

Using No Contact After the Break Up

I know that you’ve heard a lot about the concept of no contact. If you haven’t, I’ll give you a quick primer. Essentially it’s all about giving you and your ex boyfriend both some breathing room after the break up. You make a promise to yourself that you won’t contact him for at least a few weeks. I always advise women to make it at least three weeks. Your goal with this is to get stronger emotionally before you talk with him. I know, from when I went through a break up, that it’s hard to keep your composure at times right after the split. By taking a break, as in no contact, you’ll be able to distance yourself emotionally a little from the actual break up, which is incredibly helpful.

If you do this and your ex boyfriend contacts you during the no contact period, that’s great. Don’t ignore him, whatever you do. Be polite and friendly, but don’t delve into the why’s of the break up or the how’s of getting back together. You don’t want to do that too soon.

Once you do feel it’s time to open the old relationship wound begin by saying you’re sorry for what happened. If he’s receptive, that’s an incredibly good sign. Don’t push him to talk about things if he’s not ready yet. That could be disastrous.

I want to point out how you need to be patient as you start talking to him again. Don’t contact him every day and don’t send him a flurry of text messages. Let him help you set the pace by watching how he responds and taking note of how often he’s initiating contact. If you take it at a calm and easy pace, you’ll soon find that you two are talking more than ever and things are getting back to where you want them to be.

Text messages are actually becoming an important part of the communication dynamic between exes. You can use text messages in a very significant way during a break up to grab your ex boyfriend’s attention again.

Making your ex boyfriend regret leaving you is all about showing him that regardless of what happened between you two in the past, you’re still the woman he’s supposed to be with. That has to start by demonstrating to him that you’re mature enough to handle what’s happened. I understand that you may not feel very mature right now. You may feel like storming over to his house, stomping your feet and demanding he take you back. That’s obviously not something you can do right now as it will undermine any chance you may have had of getting him to want to be with you again.

Maturity is all about rising above the circumstance and conflict. Most of us want to hang onto the thing that we believe caused the break up. If you and your ex had a massive fight, and soon after he dumped you, obviously you’re going to play that argument over and over again picking it apart. It’s not good to obsess in this way at all. If you do this, you become stuck in a cycle of emotional pain. You must let it go and learn how to move towards a happier future for yourself. Do what it takes to let the anger that is associated with the break up go. Once you do this, any interaction that you have with your ex boyfriend in the future will be calm and rational. He’ll notice the difference in you immediately.

Should You Date Someone Else to Make Your Ex Boyfriend Jealous?

Many people will profess the benefits of dating someone new in an effort to get an ex back. I don’t advocate this at all. The idea that you can use someone else, preferably more successful and better looking, to drive your ex back to you, is risky, at best. Here’s the problem, as I see it. If you find a man to date and he’s oblivious to your plan, you’re toying with his emotions. That alone isn’t a good thing at all. Also, you are possibly going to push your ex boyfriend further away from you because he’ll become so overcome with jealousy that he’ll emotionally shut down. He’ll determine that you’ve moved on and he’ll look to do the same. Don’t be surprised if you try this tactic, if you suddenly learn that your ex boyfriend has his own new love interest.

This is what I suggest you do if you want to make your ex boyfriend regret leaving you:

Be happy.  There are always some lingering feelings on both sides of a break up. The person who did the dumping still will have some feelings associated with their ex. For men, their ego tends to get in the mix and that leads them to secretly take some pleasure in seeing their ex girlfriend emotionally devastated by the break up. If you appear happy, content and satisfied with your life as it is right now, that alone will serve to make him regret leaving you. He’ll wonder if the break up impacted you at all.

Be distant. Running after your ex boyfriend, be it literally chasing him down the street or calling him repeatedly, is never helpful. If you do anything remotely like this, you’re essentially handing your emotional power over to him on a silver platter. He’ll see that you’re willing to do anything to get him back so he may be tempted to toy with your emotions. Don’t allow that. Take your focus away from him and the break up and find other ways to fill your time. Your inner strength will astound him.

Be quiet. Women are notorious for being emotional talkers. We’ll talk for hours on end about what we’re feeling, what we wish our relationship was and how we want our future to be. If you do this, with your ex boyfriend, he’ll see that you’re fragile and still smitten with him. You can accomplish so much more, post break up, through silence. If you don’t say anything to your ex boyfriend, he’ll be forced to wonder what’s going through your head. You want that. It will make him think about the break up much more frequently than if you rambled on about it incessantly in email or text.

Your inner strength and ability to overcome the break up is the greatest tool at your disposal if you want to make him regret leaving you. Show him that you’re capable, happy and content without him and he’ll start to think that you’ll be better off with him. Make your ex boyfriend understand, through actions, not words that you don’t need him anymore and he’ll set out on a journey to prove you wrong.

I’ve chronicled my own quest to get my ex boyfriend back. He’s now my husband and we’re happily married. I know that things may feel difficult and bleak now, but there’s hope that you can get him back. Read my personal story here.

It’s happened. You never imagined it would happen to you, but there it is.

Whenever a relationship comes to an end, it’s very hard. You have to reflect on what went wrong and what you could have done differently as a romantic partner to ensure a happier ending. It’s really a time for self reflection and for looking towards a better future. However, when the break up comes out of left field and knocks you off your feet, that changes the entire post relationship process. You not only have to wake up the next day to face the fact that you’re no longer with the man you love, but you have to wonder why he decided to end things.

Your ex boyfriend hasn’t gotten out of this emotionally unscathed even though you may think that he has. It’s painful to dump someone even if you don’t care about them as much as you once did. Some men start to have lingering doubts about how much they truly love their girlfriend so instead of talking to her about it, they dump her. It’s a knee jerk reaction that can definitely lead to some bitter second thoughts later on. Right now your ex boyfriend may be wondering what he could do that would erase the horrible mistake he made when he told you it was over.

The Best Thing to Do When You’re Dumped Out of the Blue

The best advice I can offer in a situation like this is to sit tight and don’t react in any way. I know that’s impossibly hard when you want to call him up and scream at him for dumping you. That will only cause more damage to an already precarious connection. You really must retreat, regroup and plan what you’re going to do next.

Many women who are dumped out of nowhere believe that it’s because their ex was interested in someone else. That may very well be. You’ll only know if you hear through the gossip grapevine that he’s dating again soon after he ended things with you. The most important thing to remember in a situation like this that rebound relationship notoriously crash and burn. He may have indeed dumped you for someone else but it’s very, very unlikely to last.

Starting today focus mainly on what you can do to feel better. Don’t think about that in terms of your ex boyfriend. He’s out of your peripheral vision for now. I’m not going to suggest that you forget about him because I know that’s not possible. But I do want you to think about one thing you can do for yourself each and every day to feel better. It may be eating healthier, taking up an exercise program, spending time with friends or even indulging in a new outfit. Just do something that pampers you and only you.

You must get your wits back before you approach your ex. Doing this will take time and effort on your part. You have to build up your emotional strength again so you can face him head- on without shedding a tear. As you work towards this goal just keep telling yourself that you’re more than enough for him and one day he’ll realize it, because one day he really will.

When you do find your inner strength, text your ex again and show him that you’re the more emotionally mature, and compassionate person. By sending certain, very specific text messages to him you can actually pull him back to you with very little effort. The key is to be in control, be calm and be the confident woman you know you are.