Is there anything quite as aggravating as being ignored by the man you love? I’ve felt it in the past and I know that you’ve felt it as well. Since the break up things just haven’t been going the way you’ve wanted. Your hope was that after a bit of a cool down period your boyfriend would suddenly come to his senses and realize what he lost. I felt the same way when my ex dumped me and I just couldn’t fathom why he continually ignored me when all I wanted was a few minutes to convince him I was the one and only woman for him. If your ex boyfriend is ignoring you, it’s easy to begin to feel as though there’s no hope for reconciliation. There still is. You can actually use his behavior at the moment to your advantage.
Why Your Ex Boyfriend is Ignoring You
Men and women react very differently in the wake of a break up. That’s true whether they’re ready to move on or whether they’re both still in love. Men process emotional events in a very different way. They tend to need space to think about what’s happened and to get in touch with what they’re feeling. I call it the “cool down period.” This varies for every man but it generally lasts anywhere from a week to a month. During this time the man in question (your ex boyfriend) just needs uninterrupted time to really comes to terms with the break up and with what he wants in his future. While that’s happening you should expect him to ignore you. He needs to for his own emotional sake.
How to Use His Behavior to Your Advantage
I’m the first to admit that I haven’t always handled emotional situations with my man the way I should. Most women will admit to the same. In fact, many women will actually push their ex boyfriend to talk when he’s clearly not in the mood for it. This usually translates into numerous unanswered calls, countless text messages that get no response and even in person run-ins in which the ex boyfriend turns the other direction just to avoid contact.
As much as this hurts, you have to see it for what it is. Your ex boyfriend clearly is expressing that he doesn’t want contact. Each time you reach out to talk to him you’re not only going against what he wants and needs at the moment but you’re also devaluing yourself as a woman. In essence, you’re chasing after a man who has made it abundantly obvious that he wants nothing to do with you.
That’s why you have to mimic his behavior and drop out of sight yourself. A man feels some sense of security in knowing that a woman is still madly in love with him. Your ex boyfriend may be annoyed on the surface by your persistent attempts to talk with him, but underneath he’s likely taking pleasure in the knowledge that you’re not giving up.
Take a Step Back From Your Ex Boyfriend Right Now!
If you show your ex boyfriend that you’re done chasing him, that will impact him. Telling him isn’t going to result in anything more than him thinking you’re trying to win him back by creating pity. However, if you just stop chasing him suddenly, he’ll start to wonder why. It doesn’t matter if he’s been ignoring you for a week or a month, if you drop out of sight, he’ll suddenly want to talk to you.
This isn’t easy for most women but I want you to imagine the end result. Consider the fact that if you take a few days or weeks to rethink your own feelings post break up and during that time you stop all contact, you’re going to be in a much better position to get him back.
Many women make the mistake of thinking that if they drop off their ex boyfriend’s radar that he’ll believe they’re no longer interested. That’s how a woman’s mind thinks, not a man’s. He’s going to instead imagine you with another man. Your ex boyfriend is going to instantly jump to the conclusion that you’re done with him for good. Once that happens, the man who seemed to constantly ignore you will suddenly answer all those text messages and will be returning those voicemails.
At this point, the power in getting back shifts from his hands into yours. So find your patience and inner strength and walk away from your ex boyfriend who is ignoring you, for now. It’s likely to be one of the best decisions you’ll ever make.
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